Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Choose Me

Those who choose to know me
know me well.

Those who choose to ignore me
will, over time, learn to accept me.

Those who choose to refuse me
will never know me.


Life is full of choices. How we know someone is also a choice.

There is a statistic that I heard that the average person can know about 150 people simultaneously. Based upon the post Pick Me, everybody picks a friend. Once someone picks you as a friend it is your choice as to how you treat them in your relationship.

Choosing to know someone
When someone picks you as a friend you may find that you want to get to know that person and become more of a friend. You make an effort to try and get to know that person and get to know their personal characteristics such as Name, Occupation, Health, and Feelings. It is through this effort that you truly become a friend.
Choosing to ignore someone
I have a tendency to be very forward when it comes to letting people know I want to be their friend. This in itself may be intimidating and freaks some people out who are caught off guard. In these situations, it is easy to ignore someone who is being friendly towards you because you do not know if you want to be their friend or not. I notice that over time I become less intense— which makes people more comfortable with me. They then understand where I am coming from and accept me as someone who picked them as a friend.
Choosing to refuse someone
It takes effort to try and know someone. Likewise it takes effort to refuse someone. You will go out of your way to let that person know that they are not welcome. You will give them the silent treatment, or tell them straight up that you do not want them hanging around with you.

What I find interesting is that the number of people who fall into each category resembles a bell curve. Most people tend to fall in the ignore category— probably because it is easier to not put forth any effort and choose not to pay attention. There are very few people who choose to know me— and there are very few people that I suspect refuse me as well. I have learned to accept this distribution and am not offended by it because it makes sense to me.


Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

I love what you have to say about this Chris!

Dawn Parsons Smith said...

This is a fantastic post! I just read it to my son and it opened up a fabulous discussion for us! Thanks for the inspiration!

Wendyburd1 said...

I have never really thought about this before. I'm thinking.

Unknown said...

Choice, bell curves, all very interesting! You make excellent points. Like many things in life, being self aware first can be half the battle. You know your own limitations and expectations and have a sense of why you make different choices. I think owning who you are and where you come from make quite a difference!

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