Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Hangers On

Why do people hang on to you as a friend? That is an interesting phenomenon that I have witnessed. If anything about my Pick Me post holds true, then people pick you as a friend because they can get something out of you. But what happens when that something is no longer true?

I have a friend who's son used to party a lot at his house. He had a lot of people who hung around because he partied. Once he cleaned up his ways and stopped partying, all of his "so-called friends" stopped coming around. It makes you wonder if they were his friends to begin with.

People change and so do your circle of friends. I have a tendency to want to remain friends with people as long as possible. I realize that so often we move on in our lives and there may be some people who refuse to let go of the past.

I was speaking with a coworker on our commute home who indicated to me that an old friend was coming to visit over the weekend. I was curious as to why they appeared to dread the whole situation to which they said that their friend only talked about the past and wasn't sure how to handle their friendship now that things have changed. This made me wonder if I too am perceived as one of those people that don't "move-on".

Now that I am older, I realize that I have known a lot of people and that many just faded away without me knowing it. I do not take offense at this because it takes two people to have a relationship and if one moves away or no longer is in contact with the other, the relationship dwindles and fades away. Whenever I find someone again I have to be cautious so that I do not dwell on the past. I try to catch up on whatever has transpired since we last met and try and focus on the present. Sometimes I find that our relationship is no longer as strong as it once was and I accept it as that and try and treat them as someone I knew and not someone I am trying to rekindle with.

Post a Comment
Web Analytics