Anything that you perceive through physical contact is considered touch communication. Even sound can be perceived through touch because the sound waves move the air as they pass by your body. Touch communication is typically considered to be the most intimate of the types. We must understand that we are invading people's personal space when we do make physical contact— which is why touch communication is so intimate. Because of this intimacy— it is also the most avoided and misunderstood type of communication.
I must admit that I am not very fluent in touch communication. I admire those people who can do so without being labeled as one of those "touchy" people. I think that people tend to view touch as only sexual in nature and not used in a supportive role like visual is with verbal communication. A simple touch can be so grand— yet we tend to shy away from it for fear of being too forward.
Like any form of communication, touch communication has its own vocabulary. What does it mean when you place your hand on someones shoulder— is it being supportive… or something else. I believe that the meaning of a physical action depends upon what context you are in as well as the recipient's understanding of that action. How then can we have a dialog that uses touch?
I think that most people can be more aware of how others react to touch and be able to communicate without having the other overreact. Reaching an understanding through the other forms of communication helps to assure the other what you actually "mean" and leads towards better dialog overall.
11 comments:
i touch people a lot. i don't THINK i make people uncomfortable, but maybe i do. i like to think it reaffirms that i am listening or caring or empathizing. perhaps it just reaffirms that i am an inappropriate lunatic... i don't know.
Very interesting!
I usually get uncomfortable with "touchy people" and tend to not hear what they are saying.
I'm a touchy person. Does that count as part of the touch communication era? Does that make me cool??? I hope so, because I've never really been cool.
See---and I've heard many times that touching a guy's elbow let's him know you're into him. I still can't figure that one out...
If she is cute or well hot , she can be touchy. For guy to gal conversation I agree with Deb. Guys keep you paws to yourself or fair warning I am trained in hand to hand and you run the risk of loosing a finger, hand or arm. LOL
I love how you are going into detail with these.
I am a touch person. Huge. But the funny thing is, I'm not touchy. I don't want people to hug me or anything like that. In fact years and years ago I never touched anyone. Really, it wasn't a "safe zone" for me from where I came from. But then I went to school to be a massage therapist. Now I touch EVERYONE. Obviously I do it without mauling people, but since I get a feeling (excuse the pun) of people health and well being I do it automatically and I find it helps me in my communication as well.
Very interesting.
I also touch people a lot, but try really hard not to do it when I can sense that someone has boundary issues. But watch out if you become a close friend and you don't have boundaries, cause then you are in trouble!
I tend to be touchy with people I really like. In fact, that is kind of how I assess how much I care about someone, by whether or not I touch them.
So interesting!
When I'm trying to tell my children something important I always find that I am touching them in some way, whether it's holding their face in my hands or holding them physically in place so they can't run away. I think they understand that whatever I'm trying to tell them should be listened to. Whether they want to or not.
PS. I took a little shot at you in Petra's comments today. No offense, just having fun.
I am a touchy person and do hug a lot. But, along with that I do have a pretty good inner sense of perceiving when it's okay or not. I don't hug people if I know it makes them unconfortable.
I think we all have a inner "knowing" and some of us are more aware of it then others...that tells us when someone is safe to touch. There have been times, when I have met someone and I knew almost instantly that they were not safe...because of this inner feeling I had...I didn't allow myself to be in the position of receiving a hug from the person.
I also think how a person is brought up can be a factor...if a child is used to this kind of good touch and doesn't experience bad touch, I think that child tends to grow up into adulthood as a natural hugger or toucher...and the opposite can be true if a child grows up in a non touching home.
Very interesting post.
I am very picky about who I touch, and who I let touch me. BUT for those I do like to touch, it's essential. The first time I met my now husband, just before we left the playground we had been at with our respective kids, he touched me lightly on the back. It said alot.
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