Wednesday, June 24, 2009

My My My Paranoia

My apologies for making you think of the song My Sharona

You know the paranoia that everybody is watching you… well I have just the opposite— nobody notices me, or even wants to look my way. Granted I know that people do look my way— otherwise you wouldn't be reading this now. I just need to give you the pure form of my paranoia so that you can better understand some of my other unexplained behaviors.

I have seen a lot of people who are so afraid that people are watching. I think that many feel that others will scrutinize them and/or embarrass them to the point that they are afraid of standing out. I have seen some people go out of their way to make themselves hidden to the world. My guess is that they fear that the paparazzi or news media will find them and make a spectacle out of them.

I do not consider myself a loud or boisterous person, but I do know that I tend to perceive things differently. I tend to think that I am lost in a crowd and that I do not stand out in any way. So often I find myself trying to get people to notice and wind up being disappointed. I have made great strides in proving my observations to myself. So much so that I tend to believe them— even if they are not true. This is where my paranoia begins.

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