Secret Santa Spin

Tis' the season for Secret Santa's. It's not everyday that you can send someone the Christmas spirit just in time for the holidays. Here in the blogging world one way to send the Christmas spirit is to send readers your way.

I participated in the this week's Spin Cycle to which we were told to send a list five of our favorite bloggers, then one was picked from the list for us to write a post about. One of those blogs is from Camille @ Archives of our Lives

I like the name that Camille uses for her blog, it reminds me of my days as an Archivist. She may be Canadian, but she also has roots here in the states. Perhaps it is the combination of the two that makes her so interesting. Camille is one of those bloggers that has been around a long time. I do not remember how I discovered her blog, but I have been a loyal fan ever since. Even though I probably don't comment very often, I still try and read all of her posts. She has a meme called Saturday Steals that if you like great finds (aka: steals) you can participate in.

I think I gave enough of a smattering of what her blog is about to not give too much away, yet at the same time make you interested enough to go check her blog out for yourself.

Have a merry Christmas Camille (they do celebrate Christmas in Canada correct…) Just kidding— enjoy your holidays and looking forward to many more posts to come.

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Working Relationship

This is a follow-up to the post Relationships Relate:

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It has been said that that generation Y workers tend to value socializing more in the work place than other generations do. This makes me question what makes a relationship at work (pardon the pun) work.

I know from experience that there have been different relationships based upon my role with others. There also are examples of situations where the relationship did or did not work:

Author's note: Names have been withheld to protect the innocent.

I knew a girl at work who at first seemed to be quite relaxed and laid back. I found out off hand that she attended the same college as I did. I later found out that there was a preseason basketball game sponsored by the alumni association. I invited her because I felt that she would have fun going to see a game. I don't remember the words that she said, but it gave me the impression that my offer was more than just a friendly get together which deeply offended me. We went to the game, but went separate ways after the game was over. I went to the reception after the game and reconnected with several former roommates and had a lot more fun with them than I did with her.

Just blame it on my Libra tendencies, but I feel that having a balance between being personal and professional makes getting along with others in the workplace more effective. Those people that do not always act professional are typically more approachable because they are not overly serious. They are the kind of people who are professional and get respect for the work they do because they do their work so well.

Jump forward eighteen years. I worked with a girl who was just the same age as the other person. The only difference was that she was more than willing to go out to lunch with any of her co-workers. I think the difference was that she knew the importance of socializing and was able to balance the work that she did with the social aspect of work. There was an unwritten limit that we all knew and we were well aware of where the line was and never crossed it.

I'll leave you with a few pondering thoughts… What makes a relationship "work"? Is there some magic formula that makes having a relationship easier or more difficult?

Acting Relationship

This is a follow-up to the post Relationships Relate:

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I don't know how many times I have seen actors getting married after they are in a movie together. One would think that the actors would know that they are playing a part and not get romantically involved, but they do. I think that this assumption is why many people think that when you are in a romantic role, that you must "really" be romantic. Having played romantic leads myself I have encountered both good and bad acting relationships.

Author's note: Names have been withheld to protect the innocent.

In high school I played opposite the same girl two years in a row. The first year there seemed to have been a rumor that I was planning on french kissing her during the kissing scene. This prompted her to change the kiss to be more of a cheek brush by the end of the show. Unfortunately I was cast to play opposite her in a lead role the following year. By this time the rift was so great that she was being rude and extremely snobbish towards me backstage. My only defense was to ignore her. By the end of the show I knew that there had to be a better way of getting along with someone that you are playing a romantic lead with.

Jump forward two years… I was in a summer youth theater production and got the lead role opposite a girl who was just as old as the first girl when I had a lead with her. However, this person was much more mature both on and off the stage, which made the romantic scenes a lot easier to do (even being on stage in my underwear). It made me realize that you don't have to be romantically involved with someone when playing a romantic role. If you can play the part correctly, you can make the role work without looking awkward to the audience, or pissing off the person you are opposite of.

According to the post Be true to yourself as your own self true, I talk about behaving differently when in different social groups. If you think about it, we "act" the part much like an actor does when on the stage. The stage in this sense is the group that you are in and the audience is the group's members. You may think that this group stage does not have a true off stage, but we are the actors and we thus turn off our persona when we are not around the group (just like actors do when they cross from on stage to off stage).

One final thought that I will make you ponder rather than point out. We tend to act a part when in groups, but what about actual romantic relationships— do we play a part there as well?

Relationships Relate

From early on I realized that I valued relationships very highly. What I also found is that I tended to view relationships more seriously, and gave them a far greater importance overall. I think that this artificial elevation of the importance of relationships is something that others view as well. This is what typically got me into trouble when wanting a relationship. I tended to value the relationship in such a way that would make me appear either desperate or overly serious. What I have learned as of late, is that relationships do not have to be held in such high esteem.

I tend to look at things and try and figure out how they work. Much of my Personal Philosophy posts revolve around how I perceive the inner workings of relationships. One conclusion that I came to is that relationships relate.

We all interact with other people in one way or another. Unless you are trapped on a deserted island, you will always encounter other people. How you choose to interact with those people is basically how you relate to them. The fact that you are relating to the person means that you are in a relationship with them.

Rather than giving examples in this post, I decided to break it up into separate posts to allow those posts to stand on their own, as well as relate back to this post (no pun intended):

• Acting Relationship
• Working Relationship

For now I will only list the examples to give you a chance to chime in and give me your opinion about them (or even offer other examples to use as well). Then when they have been posted, the bullet points will be changed to be links (to better relate them to this post).

What do you think… do relationships relate? Do we give the word Relationship too much importance?